Not alone

Two weeks ago, my wife and I sent out an urgent appeal for prayer to our family and friends.

My wife was in a Milan, Italy hospital in excruciating pain after falling head first into a stationary taxi while running.  She had suffered what we later learned was a spinal cord contusion, sending shooting pains into her arms and hands - causing her to cry out.  At that moment, her hands were useless.

This was not the first time - nor will it be the last - that we found out the value of praying together.

In the next few days, we got little sleep as we navigated our way through the hospital system and arranged our flight home to family.  There were numerous problems - partly linguistic, partly bureaucratic.

We believe it was God, working through praying family and friends, who got us through.

We Western Christians tend to take our hardy individualism into our prayer lives.  I believe that is a mistake.

In his book And The Place Was Shaken, author John Franklin says that the majority of Jesus' references to prayer in the New Testament are to praying together.

It is true that Jesus often prayed alone.  We all need to cultivate strong personal prayer lives.  I am aware of my own shortcomings in this area.

But Jesus' model prayer - popularly known as the Lord's Prayer - uses the plural "our" and "us".  It was obviously intended as a guide to group prayer.

And Jesus himself asked several of his closest friends to join him in support as he prayed to his Father in the Garden of Gethsemane - the night he was betrayed.

In Acts 4, the church in Jerusalem prays as a group, seeking courage to preach the gospel in the midst of persecution.

The apostle Paul constantly asked his friends and acquaintances for prayer in his letter to young churches.

Jesus said there was something special about praying together.  In Matthew 18:19-20, he says:

"If two of you here on earth agree on anything you ask, my Father in heaven will do it for you.  For where two or three gather together as my followers, I am there among them."

Praying in agreement with each other - and with Jesus who is with us - works wonders.

My wife and I know this to be true.

We need to be helpless

Praying shows dependence - dependence on God.

We Western Christians find it hard to pray because we are used to running our lives efficiently on our own.  We have the answers to life's problems - we don't need God.

And yet, when we look back at how we manage our lives, we realize our problem-solving skills aren't that good.  Our relationships with others are sometimes broken or strained, despite what we think was the wise way to deal with issues.

Paul Miller, author of A Praying Life, says helplessness fuels prayer.  Sometimes we don't realize we are ignoring God and the counsel and supernatural direction he offers - until things break down.

The apostle Paul tells us in Philippians 4:6 that we should not worry about anything but pray about everything.

"Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done," Paul says.

Notice that Paul says to pray about everything - not some things.  That includes the areas you and I are quite capable of managing ourselves.  We may think we are capable, but God is more capable.

In effect, Paul is saying we must give everything into God's hands and stop tossing and turning at night over real or imaginary problems.  Thanking God for what he is doing in our circumstances helps build our trust in him - and our peace of mind.

"The very thing we are allergic to - our helplessness - is what makes prayer work," says Miller.  "It works because we are helpless.  We can't do life on our own."

He goes on to say that mature Christians pray a lot because they are aware of their weakness.  They need God.

Miller recalls feeling desperate about parenting six children between the ages of two and 16.  Things were not going well.  He asked God for the grace to pray for them, knowing his instinctive "can-do" approach wasn't working.

The atmosphere in the home began to change.  In one case, he had been praying for his son to recognize he had a problem with humility.  Some months later, his son came to him and told him: "Dad, I have been thinking a lot about humility lately and my lack of it."

"It didn't take me long to recognize that I did my best parenting by prayer.  I began to speak less to the kids and more to God. It was actually quite relaxing."

May the Lord give me the grace to see my need of him.

Pray while you work

Jan Johnson says you can pray while you work.

Sounds impossible, doesn't it?  But what she says makes sense.

I must say that I have been letting other things draw me away from prayer the last little while.  Some are laudable reasons, others basically time-wasting.

Johnson, author of Enjoying the Presence of God, says that she realized years ago that she would end a frantic business day without spending time with God.

"Sure I bellowed out a breath prayer now and then, but I missed God's abiding presence, something I'd learned to enjoy."

Yet she knew other Christians over the ages made time to pray while they worked.  One such person was Brother Lawrence, a 17th century French monk who conversed with God while he was working in the monastery kitchen.

Johnson tried various techniques to bring her mind back to God, including a candle in her workplace.  She would look at the candle and it would prompt her to pray.

Not everyone is able - or would wish - to try the candle idea.  But we can use other visual reminders.

When Johnson looked at the candle, she would murmur "thank you" as she remembered she had an income.

As you are reminded to talk with God, you can bring before him the project you are working on.  Or, you can simply praise him for who he is and what he has done in your life.  These are life-giving prayers.

"Busywork - formatting computer disks, mowing the lawn, cleaning the carpet - invites another level of thinking in which we contemplate the words, wisdom and challenges of others."

As we think about God, we may find that a "comment on the telephone five minutes ago provides an answer that [we] asked God earlier in the day".

"By respecting the rhythm of prayer and work," Johnson says, "we create moments for the still, small voice of God to become clear."

She refers to comments by hospital chaplain Ernest Boyer, Jr., who recommends we stop for a couple of minutes before starting any task and remind ourselves that we "delight God in a thousand and one ways".

"Try to feel this great love toward you so that when you begin your work you make it a response to that love."

Johnson also suggests repeating short prayers such as "God loves me", "I delight in you, God", or "this task is for you, God".  When you finish the task, take a moment to enjoy completing the work and offer it to the Lord.

She adds that we should invite God into the "chatter" in our heads and turn the complaints, worries, memories and questions into prayers.

Just thinking about Johnson's ideas helps me see that my work would go much more smoothly and with less strain if I talked with God while I was doing it.

"Nothing that we do is too ordinary or too boring for God," writes Johnson. "He delights in us not because we are entertaining, but because we are his."